{"id":36,"date":"2007-03-27T20:13:25","date_gmt":"2007-03-28T04:13:25","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/rayivey.com\/wordpress\/?p=36"},"modified":"2007-03-27T22:56:43","modified_gmt":"2007-03-28T06:56:43","slug":"beijing-diary-part-1","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.rayivey.com\/wordpress\/beijing-diary-part-1\/","title":{"rendered":""},"content":{"rendered":"\"Facebook\"<\/a>\"twitter\"<\/a>\"rss\"<\/a>\"instagram\"<\/a>

A SELF-ESTEEM-CHALLENGING BEGINNING<\/font><\/p>\n

I begin my Asian Odyssey by being scammed by the United Airlines Skycap guy.\u00a0 <\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/p>\n

In my defense, it was 4:30 in the morning and I barely had a pulse, much less upper brain function.\u00a0 <\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/p>\n

Here’s what happened.\u00a0 After weighing my single bag for check-in, the Skycap came over and informed me my bag was 5 pounds overweight.\u00a0 I wasn’t surprised.\u00a0 (YOU try to pack for a three-week business trip without going over fifty pounds.)<\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/p>\n

Mr. Helpful Skycap took my passport, credit card and boarding pass and bounded away to get my $50 overweight fee paid.\u00a0 Ten minutes later he returned.<\/font>\u201cI talked him out of the fee!\u201d\u00a0 His eyes shone with conspiratorial glee.\u00a0 \u201cAll I had to do was tip him $20.\u201d<\/font><\/font><\/font> <\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/p>\n

Okay, okay, I know, all of my alarm signals should have gone off at that point.\u00a0 Like I said, it was 4:30 in the morning, I wanted off the sidewalk and into the terminal, and I just didn’t have the strength to start off the staggeringly long travel day with a showdown with this guy.\u00a0 Remember, he’s the person in charge of getting my bag to Beijing.\u00a0 I was afraid that getting into it with him would be the equivalent of harassing a waiter, only to have your soup spit in.\u00a0 I didn’t want my overweight bag to end up in Yemen.\u00a0 <\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/p>\n

I pulled out my walled and sourly gave him $15.<\/font><\/font><\/font>Of course, as I stood in the (football field length, even at 4:40 in the a.m.) security line, I had more and more time to think about it and get humiliated and angry.\u00a0 I told my story to several UA personnel, and mostly what I got was a very annoying, \u201cWell, you know those guys don’t work for the airline.\u201d<\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/p>\n

Well, fuck you, United Airlines.\u00a0 The Skycaps wear United Airlines jackets and they check you in for United Airlines flights.\u00a0 They’re representing United Airlines, goddamnit.\u00a0 Eat me.<\/font><\/font><\/font> <\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/p>\n

After several employees managed to convince me that, being ripped off aside, my bag would most assuredly end up in Beijing, I was able to relax a bit and go from feeling anxious to merely stupid.<\/font><\/font><\/font>Then I got my first laugh of the day as I had an early breakfast at \u201cRuby’s Cafe.\u201d\u00a0 Ruby’s is an ersatz classic 50s All-American coffee shop, with the exception that, like most airport eateries, you stood in a line and gave your order at the front register.<\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/p>\n

I sat down to await my $15 egg sandwich and noticed that my table, like all the others, had on its side, in a classic chrome metal clip, a bright red-and-white menu.\u00a0 Just like diners of days gone by!\u00a0 Hang on, I thought.\u00a0 Why did I order up front.<\/font>Curiously, I pulled out the large laminated rectangular menu, only to discover it wasn’t a menu at all!\u00a0 It just LOOKED like a menu!\u00a0 The cafe was actually using props.\u00a0 Maybe it was the hour, but this struck me as uniquely hilarious.<\/font><\/font><\/font> <\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font><\/font>\u00a0<\/p>\n

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