Took a very nice walk along the Isar River after work. They’ve been doing a lot of work on the river, tons of landscaping, beaches, floating walking paths, tunnels, recreation areas, etc. It’s wildly pleasant. Everyone’s on their bikes and walking with their families or sweethearts. The weather was fantastic.
Speaking of bikes, I wish I could take urban planners from all over the States, jam them into a plane, and take them to Munich to see the enormous benefits a large city receives when it becomes truly friendly to bicycle traffic.
It’s really a revelation to walk around a city that embraces the bicycle to the degree that Munich does. Any other city this size in the states would be much more choked with cars than Munich is. When you get such a high percentage of your population on public transportation and two-wheeled transportation, your automobile traffic simply isn’t as bad.
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I think I found a great public meeting place in Munich. There’s a large fountain in front of one of the old city gates in an area called Karlsplatz (or Stachus). I was there last night after saying so long to my pal Tex at City Segway Tours, and it seems that every attractive young Municher was there waiting for his/her date. It would be a great place to snap candids or just people watch. Incidentally, adjacent to this fountain is the largest-business-volume McDonalds in the world.
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I stopped by City Segway tours to say so long to my tour guide Tex. I had forgotten to write on his floor (it’s a thing), so I composed something nice and suggestive. “This’ll give your customers something to ask you about, ” I said.
Segway Tours I’ve Done
Berlin
Minneapolis (Old Mill area)
Munich
Average Rating: 4.6 out of 5 based on 208 user reviews.
Yes. I am beautiful on a Segway. Particularly when I'm not falling over.
I began the day with a four hour private Segway tour of Berlin. I say private because I was the only one signed up for the tour. This was fantastic, as it meant I had the tourguide – an adorable gay ex-pat video artist named Kevin – to my self. He was a great tourguide and gave me a great introduction to Berlin.
For decades, the Brandenburg Gate was in the Dead Zone between layers of The Wall.
Berlin’s history, when you look back on the last 100 years, is simply insane. It’s mind-boggling how much has happened in this city. Two world wars, the poisonous paranoia of post-War East Germany, the fall of Communism, the Reunification, etc. It’s just a titanic amount of events in a relatively short period.
I learned from Kevin that Berlin has a very popular openly gay mayor.
You have to give the graffiti artist credit for effort on this one. It's in the middle of the river.
I also learned that Berlin is sinking into the swamp. There are blue pipes all over the city which are literally pumping water into the water table to keep the city afloat. The main cathedral of Berlin is sinking at an alarming rate.
We, of course, went to Checkpoint Charlie. It’s such a cliché, I didn’t expect it to be particularly interesting. But it was surprisingly moving to see the old sign – “You are entering the American sector” and its chilly reverse. The former location of the Wall is marked by a double line of cobblestones that winds its way through Berlin. Of course they left a little bit of it actually standing, just for history’s sake.
During the War, specially trained Nazi dachshunds were members of an elite squad known as the "judenschniffen."
In many places the Wall had a very wide “Dead Zone” between the two layers of wall, and so when it came down in 1989 the city suddenly had a huge amount of undeveloped real estate right in the middle of town. They’ve built many interesting new things on it, including the Jewish Holocaust Memorial.
"The Pope's Revenge"
Kevin also told me a fun story about the godawful ugly tower which juts up out of the Alexanderplatz (a huge transit hub). It’s a phallic concrete monstrosity built by the East Germans as a way to show the superiority of Communist know-how and engineering. The only trouble is, the brain drain from East Germany had been so severe that the building couldn’t actually be designed or built by East Germans. So they secretly snuck in an entire work force from Sweden to build the thing. Of course, the truth was found out eventually. It generally is.
Another amusing thing about the tower. East Germany was officially atheist, remember, while the rest of Berlin remained Lutheran and Catholic. When the tower was completed an interesting and unexpected natural phenomenon occurred when the sun was in the west: Its reflection on the bumpy globe at the top of the tower creates a perfect cross. Locally it’s known as “The Pope’s Revenge.”
Kevin also was a wealth of good advice on where to get a hair cut, and what neighborhoods would be fun to explore. This was good info to get because Berlin is one of those cities that doesn’t have a real center, which can make it intimidating for a tourist.
"I know! We'll name our convenience store after a failed artificial language! That'll really bring the customers in!!"
I am good on the Segway. This was my second time I’ve done a Segway tour. However, I did have one unfortunate moment when I was dismounting and the beast got itself into a slow but unstoppable spiral. It and me went down. I’m not hurt, but I my right side is pretty bruised and sore. What was worse was, I did it right in the middle of about a thousand people. I think that hurt more than the fall.
Reasons Tourguide Kevin Will Give Up His Life in Berlin to Move to Los Angeles To Be With Me
… okay, guys, a little help here? There’s got to be some reasons we can come up with . . .
Average Rating: 4.4 out of 5 based on 238 user reviews.
Speaking of bikes, I wish I could take urban planners from all over the States, jam them into a plane, and take them to Munich to see the enormous benefits a large city receives when it becomes truly friendly to bicycle traffic. 
